Affairs of the Heart

One of my most earnest prayers lately has been for God to guard my heart. And for me to understand what that means. Not only has God kept watch over it, he has put it away for someone only worthy of it chosen by the big man himself. That doesn't stop your heart from aching. It doesn't stop your heart from feeling. It only keeps your heart strong whenever an ache does come along. You no longer feel like your world comes crashing down whenever things don't work out with that guy/girl like you had hoped. But whenever you have your heart guarded that doesn't mean you become cold and distant from people. I've actually found that to be quite the contrary.


Earlier this summer I went through a rough break up. Rough on me and rough on the guy. My heart was damaged. I was hurting. The people closest to me knew this and listening to their advice did help, but that didn't stop it from hurting. I immediately started praying that God would keep my heart in his hands. Heal it. Mold it. Make it shine. And in that I found that with God having the human side of my heart, I have a yearning to find God's heart to replace what I had given him. God doesn't call us to keep our hearts to ourselves. In fact we're supposed to sacrifice them for him and to him. And then we're supposed to share that peace/joy/love with everyone, even if it is just a simple hello or genuine smile to someone that we usually don't talk to or see. He promises to take care of us no matter what and who am I to argue with that?


In that I have been more open with people. More loving towards others and myself. I used to keep quiet and to myself at work but over this semester I've talked to the people I work with and for and I can honestly say that it's been a completely eye opening experience to who I work with and what they've faced, what they enjoy, what they like outside of the office walls. I have made friends in my classes. Last year I was actually terrified of even speaking to other people. This year, it's actually completely different. I know the people around me, what's going on in their lives and I love it! I love the new me. I love who God is shaping me to be. I have a prayer that I pray every morning whenever I wake up.


"God thank you for another day. Love me, lead me, guide me, guard me, keep me."


In that prayer is everything I could ever want from God. I couldn't survive without his love. I would have no direction if he didn't lead me. While he is leading me I need him to show me the way not just forge the path. This whole post is about his guarding my heart so of course I want that. I want to be in his hands held firm thru the storms and the aches. I know I have to go thru them, but I certainly don't want to face them without protection from the man that knows why everything happens. 


Live Today.   

Shake a Hand

7 December. "A day that will live in infamy." Those words still ring true and the date 7 December still stirs feelings of national unity and gratitude towards those who are serving, yet why do we need specific days to remind us of the people that are serving us in the most humble way possible, a way that we probably won't ever get to witness or experience? This questions puzzles me exceedingly.


This Thanksgiving, I had the pleasure of spending a wonderful day with family that fixed some fabulous food. I mean that stuff was GREAT. But I also had the pleasure of hanging with an amazing soldier. He's serving right now, and got a short vacation to come back and visit his beautiful and wonderful wife (my cousin, D) and just have some down time. Seeing him with her and how happy they are together made my heart just overflow with happiness for them. He makes her smile and laugh and just all around the most joyful person. And that's what true love is all about. 


However this amazing soldier not only makes my cousin happy, he serves his country. No matter what sacrifices he has to make. He and D have picked up and moved twice in the short time that they've been married and the most recent move has taken them overseas. While on a base overseas, he learns that he has to go back to the war for another tour. I can't even imagine what is going through his mind whenever he learns that he has to leave his new wife and go back into a war-zone. However, no matter what is going through his mind he goes. D comes back to the US for a little bit and I can guarantee you that we've loved having her back, but seeing her and him together over Thanksgiving made me smile and at the same time broke my heart. Only a few short days after Thanksgiving he was going to have to leave again and they would wait many more months before they get to see each other again. This is a picture captured right before he headed off.


This is the epitome of servitude and strength. It takes an extremely strong person to leave comfort and go into a place literally outside of their comfort zone. I can think of nothing more heartwarming to me than watching soldiers run off a plane to be greeted by the ones who miss them and love them. This summer as I was waiting for my luggage in an airport around 11:30 pm a plane full of soldiers landed and as the passengers got off the entire airport just stopped and a roar of applause rang out over the entire airport. I get teary eyed simply thinking about the soldiers I saw run from the gate to someone with outstretched arms. I even saw a few of them crying. 


Think about the way a simple thank you brightens your world. Even if it is from someone you don't even really know. The fact that they've taken time out of their day to acknowledge your work is a great feeling. That being said, shake a soldiers hand.(They deserve much more than a handshake, but it might be awkward if you just ran up and straight hugged them.) Tell them thank you for serving. These men and women are the strongest people in the world that would never tell you what they've gone thru for people they will never meet.


So, a huge thank you to men and women and my own family that are serving. (He may have married in, but he's considered full family.) You are thought of, you are prayed for, and you are appreciated. 

Live Today.