We all have days where we feel "not too special". The only remedy I know for that is love. However, not a love that is simply said, but a love that is communicated thru your eyes, touch, and respect.
I saw my cousin get married this weekend and I can tell you right now, the love I saw in the bride and groom had all three of the previously described elements. Watching "A" (no, not the evil one. Clarification for all you PLL fans) walk down the aisle, I began to weep. I wish I could find a better word but tears began to stream and it was almost like everything in the world was absolutely right. My cousin was marrying a man that will protect her, guide her, and support her. What more could a person want? Someone who will truly love her.
He will make her feel special every day that he is able, and I hope she will never have a full 24 hours of feeling "not too special". But then I think, "Does is always take a relationship to keep that feeling at bay?" Well, yes and no.
Yes in the sense that it takes a relationship. The answer is also no because it doesn't mean you have to walk down an aisle to be truly loved.
I read The Shack this weekend as well. I won't say that it completely transformed my life, but it did give me a better look into the workings of relationships.
“If you and I are friends, there is an expectancy that exists within our relationship. When we see each other or are apart, there is expectancy of being together, of laughing and talking. That expectancy has no concrete definition; it is alive and dynamic and everything that emerges from our being together is a unique gift shared by no one else. But what happens if I change that ‘expectancy’ to an ‘expectation’–spoken or unspoken? Suddenly, law has entered into our relationship. You are now expected to perform in a way that meets my expectations. Our living friendship rapidly deteriorates into a dead thing with rules and requirements."
I saw my cousin get married this weekend and I can tell you right now, the love I saw in the bride and groom had all three of the previously described elements. Watching "A" (no, not the evil one. Clarification for all you PLL fans) walk down the aisle, I began to weep. I wish I could find a better word but tears began to stream and it was almost like everything in the world was absolutely right. My cousin was marrying a man that will protect her, guide her, and support her. What more could a person want? Someone who will truly love her.
He will make her feel special every day that he is able, and I hope she will never have a full 24 hours of feeling "not too special". But then I think, "Does is always take a relationship to keep that feeling at bay?" Well, yes and no.
Yes in the sense that it takes a relationship. The answer is also no because it doesn't mean you have to walk down an aisle to be truly loved.
I read The Shack this weekend as well. I won't say that it completely transformed my life, but it did give me a better look into the workings of relationships.
“If you and I are friends, there is an expectancy that exists within our relationship. When we see each other or are apart, there is expectancy of being together, of laughing and talking. That expectancy has no concrete definition; it is alive and dynamic and everything that emerges from our being together is a unique gift shared by no one else. But what happens if I change that ‘expectancy’ to an ‘expectation’–spoken or unspoken? Suddenly, law has entered into our relationship. You are now expected to perform in a way that meets my expectations. Our living friendship rapidly deteriorates into a dead thing with rules and requirements."
It's hard for me to live without expectations. I expect to have an outcome, I expect to make a grade, I expect so many things without realizing what I am doing. I am experiencing relationships that have rules and guidelines. While that might be okay in the school context, expectation can hinder relationships that are even the slightest bit different from what I imagine. I've always been told, "Do things for people without EVER expecting anything back." A friendship is not the number of times you do something for someone.
A relationship that communicates true love is not one of expectations. You will inevitably be let down. The let down will be followed by disappointment and the disappointment followed by hurt. For me, I would like to stop the cycle. I want to walk away from the expectations and experience a unique and dynamic relationship with people.
Live Today.
